How hairy were your assholes before this? You know they used to do in the eighties, when chicks have hair they didn’t want? They used to bleach it. They have hair they don’t want now, It’s gone! They’re removing it from their assholes now. All kinds of hair removing methods as, There’s waxing, there’s electrolysis, there’s threading, there’s… laser hair removal. It’s OK nowadays that chicks have hair, Nowadays chicks can take care of it, you know what I mean? Chicks have hair they don’t want nowadays, they can get rid of it. Indian girls getting mad, pulling down their sleeves, “I hate this son of a bitch!” Come here.” “OK, look.” “I’m going to take these people here.” “And put them in the hottest place in the world.” “And just for fun,” “I’ll cover them with hair.” It’s hot and we’re hairy. Watch this.” “Buddha, put down the drink. He was like, “Hey, guys, come here and watch this. Who the hell came up with that deal? I think the God that was making Indian people was having some sort of practical joke with all the other Gods. It’s hot as hell in India, and we’re hairy. “Yeah, well, we’ll take eyes.” “You guys can have noses and hair.” My people are greedy, “We heard two! We got two! That’s a good deal, two!” “Noses and hair!” We didn’t know it was gonna be big noses and body hair. When God was making Asians, he made two types of Asians. When I say ‘Asian,’ people don’t go… We’re Asian too, man. It’s funny, when I say ‘ Asian,’ especially in America, when I say ‘Asian,’ people automatically picture in their head, Which is messed up because India is part of Asia, and we don’t get the same credit. I don’t know how the hell we’re in California, only six Latinos showed up. “If I go to America and I get white woman,” “I’m ahead of the game.” Latinos in the house? Where the Latinos at? All right, all six of you. Good job, buddy, huh? Her parents must be so happy. All right, a white guy with a brown girl. There’s uh… White people, how you doing? White folks, good to see you. There’s a lot of closed motels in town right now, I tell you that.

I thought they were shooting Fast and The Furious Part 3 or something. That’s uh… I saw all the Honda Civics in the parking lot. We got– clearly we got some Asians in the house.

All right, look at you, you filthy downloaders. Here he is, guys! Russell Peters! Īll right. My man, Russell Peters! Yeah, brothers know his name. Ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen, please, if you say that, gentlemen.

Call me russell by russell peters